Big News

Okay, I've been working on this one a while so here it is...and no I'm not pregnant!  Let's just get that out of the way.  But since this is the month of gratitude and it is also National Adoption Month it seems like the perfect time to start telling everyone that we have our papers back in and are approved to adopt. This was not a rash decision by any means.  We have been talking about it since Ian was born, and we've been working on our paperwork since June.  It's a lot of stuff. We have put a lot of thought and prayer into this and feel like it is the right thing to do.  I don't know if we will end up with a baby, but we're going to give it a try (at least for a while--don't worry we don't want to be coming in on canes to high school graduation)!

Some people reading this already know, but I'm sure others are totally surprised and think I've lost my marbles and that's okay.  I've had mixed reactions from the people I've told so far.  For whatever reason I feel like I need to explain and even kind of justify myself on this one so here goes.  I guess the biggest reason we are doing this is because we would love to have another child.  Hopefully that's the reason anyone tries to have a baby.  I know we spent lots of money and time and emotion getting our other kids here and I am so grateful for them but that is in the past, and I just consider us like any other couple that would like a larger family (just one more I promise).  I don't really think anyone would question us if we were just like any other couple getting pregnant, but I guess we're really not. 

As far as why adoption, there are quite a few reasons.  Neither Jer or I feels like IVF is the right thing to do.  We think it is too big of a financial burden as well as too much time away, stress, etc. for me from our kids for something that may not even work.  We do not have any embryos leftover from our cycle with Ian.  It really was not a great IVF cycle other than of course the really great part where it worked.  Anyway, neither of us feels up to spending tons of money and making a bazillion trips to Salt Lake for something that may well fail.  We feel like if there is meant to be another baby for our family then adoption is the way it will happen.  We really are trying to leave this in God's hands.

I have spent a lot of time thinking and worrying about whether it is fair for us to try and adopt again when there are lots of couples with none or only one child out there also trying to adopt.  It has kept me up at night.  When we were taking the adoption classes before Seth's placement there was a couple in our class with four biological kids.  I can't remember exactly why they were trying to adopt, but I didn't even care.  I felt bitter towards them.  I thought she was very selfish.  Now I see it a little differently.  I don't think it's unreasonable to want to have four children.  I don't see that I have a lot of other options.  I am not preventing pregnancy.  It is just out of my control like it always has been.  I guess I'm a little more understanding now.  I also understand now that adoption is an inspired process and the right birth family gets matched up with the right adoptive family.  I have no doubt that Seth was meant for our family.  So with that in mind, I don't think that the same kind of birth moms are looking for young parents with no kids as would be looking for a family like ours.  That's what I think.

My last point is don't think for a second that Jer and I are claiming to be perfect parents...far from it.  We are just doing our best, trying to have lots of fun and make memories together, and trying to teach our kids the gospel and raise them to be good people.  When you adopt you have to somewhat sell yourself, but at the same time we are trying to be very honest about what our family life is like.  We are definitely a work in progress!  If you want to check out our profile please do:  https://www.itsaboutlove.org/ial/profiles/24947784/ourMessage.jsf
and if you know someone who may be considering adoption please feel free to pass it on to them.  Thanks for reading this really long, rambly post!

This was the day we brought Seth home.  It was one of the most amazing days of my life. We experienced the intense heartache of saying goodbye to Seth's birthparents, brought home our brand new baby son, watched Luke become a big brother, and just tried to take it all in.  It is a day I will never forget.  Adoption is not easy, but it truly is a miracle.  I am hoping there is one more out there for us.
                                    


P.S.  If you have feedback on our profile that's great.  I am going to let lots more people know soon via FaceBook to get the word out.  I know our pictures look a little distorted.  The website compresses them.  I am in the process of resizing them and hopefully when I re upload them all they will look better.  Any tips are appreciated.

Halloween and Stuff

October went by in a blur.  I didn't take very many pictures, but we did do a few fun things inbetween the regular, everyday stuff.  Right now Seth is on my lap and we are jamming out to the Chipmunks.  If you are tempted to download that for your kids just be prepared to listen to it--a lot!!  It's also snowing huge flakes outside!  Last week I was wearing shorts and doing yard work.  Ready or not I think winter is coming.

A trip to the dino park in Ogden on a sunny day.

An outing to pick out some pumpkins.  We got awesome ones for dirt cheap and both painted and carved some.  Seth could care less about carving, but he is into smearing on lots of paint.

Seth still loves Ms. Jenny's preschool and had a very fun Halloween party.  He went in costume, but I took a picture of him in his spider hat later.  I also got to go help with Luke's class party.  I was in charge of games.  We played wrap the mummy and make the zomby laugh.  I think all the kids had fun.  I actually dressed up and didn't take a picture for the second year in a row!  Thanks to my friend Cami for being my costume hook up.  I would be in big trouble without her help.

Mandy and I took the boys (and Gentry) to the fall farm festival for the third year running.  They took away a lot of the fun stuff this year like the crazy slide, but the kids didn't really seem to notice and had lots of fun anyway.

Ian made a little farm friend.

The train now has this tiny little caboose.

I really tanked on Halloween pictures.  The ones I did take were pretty much terrible.  We went to our ward trunk or treat and party and by then it was pouring rain.  We trick or treated a few houses after that including our annual stop to my Aunt Julie's house.

Luke had his heart set on being a ninja this year, but we couldn't find a costume that he loved that much.  Seth also wanted to be a red ninja.  With the help of Luke's old karate pants we figured something out for Seth.  I decided to get some fabric for Luke's costume.  By the time the pattern came from Ebay it was kind of last minute but his Grandma Cid whipped it out for him, and he was so excited that she made it.  Thanks Cid!  He loved it, and he really thought it was special that his grandma made it for him.  Ian was a stinkin' cute puffy dragon.

Last Sunday we went down to my mom's house for her annual Halloween dinner.  As usual she went all out to make it fun for the kids.  I didn't take a single picture, but it was really cute.  She made up a really fun treasure hunt with rhyming clues that Luke read and the kids followed around to find some little prizes and they had a blast.  It was a great day with way too much candy consumed by all.  I owe my mom a special post all of her own just for all of her help this past weekend.  I was sick which isn't that big of deal but Jer was out of town, Ian had the pukes, and I had basketball games, church responsibilities, and no way to be two places at one time, so she was a huge help.  Thanks mom...you're the best!